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Lost and Alone

I would be rather lost and alone. I am still processing all of the pain of having to end yet another marriage, it's not the end of the marriage that I'm sad about but the fact that I never should have gotten married in the first place. Not this time. I have friends with long memories that have been pointing out that he has done a number of things over the years that would give me more reasons to leave than I ever had to stay. 

While I can remember the frustration at having to explain bills to a man that was almost forty when I met him I had forgotten some of the other things. We used to have a joint checking account and that was a mistake. He overdrew that so many times they finally closed it out, I'm glad I was only a signer on the account. The last time I do believe was this past October, he went to a motel instead of going to stay with family spending over $100 a night that wasn't in the account at all. Silly me I paid the bills that month. It was Halloween and I desperately tried to get the baby into her costume and she refused. So we stayed home. 

My youngest daughter is nearly five and has never been trick or treating. It's kind of sad but that's life, she was never interested in it. Well, I'm going to go now since I forgot what I was saying all together.



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