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Cancellation of the Regularly Scheduled Chaos

The regularly scheduled chaos has been cancelled; that is a good thing. Peace is coming slowly. How did the chaos end? I left my husband.

The response has varied but it has been unanimous. It was the best thing I could have done. Basically it was along the lines of "pick a better guy if you decide to get married again," "it's about time," and "congratulations, he made you miserable and he wasn't all that bright." OK so maybe I edited the responses a little but it's my prerogative. You get the idea, they didn't like him then and don't like him now. He has no idea that instead of getting rid of them I just managed to keep in contact during the brief moments he was not inserting himself up my ass to ensure I was not enjoying myself in the slightest.

It seems the only one unaware that he caused me a great deal of stress and made me miserable was and still is him. It is not that he has not been told; he did not/does not comprehend. Those closest to me can tell you easily that he made me miserable from the start.

Of course they'll also tell you that no matter what I may have said at the time he was not my type, and they are sure he was too broke for me. I'm sure I had my reasons for marrying him at the time. I know love, which should have been the reason was not. He still does not know that. 

It did not take long before I was unable to hide the fact he disgusted me; he may have missed it but I did not hide it. Anyone with eyes could see it. It did not require looking too far beyond the surface to see it. Paying attention was all that was required.

It has not sunk in yet that I have left him. It has or should have sunk in by now that he does not make a living wage. Actually, he doesn't make enough to get himself to work, and eat. He cannot afford insurance, repairs, or utility bills. Or maybe I'm just insane, I have this annoying rule that if you are having trouble keeping food in the house you cannot buy alcohol. I don't know about your kids but mind cannot eat whiskey. 

Well, it's time to go back to the peace that is trying to invade. Amazing what happens when you get rid of deadweight. 



Comments

Unknown said…
Life is not transparent and so how could you have known how your marriage to this man would have turned out? With all things we have a choice and when one feels something so strong that the urge is to leave and change one's life for the better, then that is the right decision. It goes without saying that everything will be different at first, the thoughts of change daunting perhaps but in truth there is now a clarity that paves the road ahead and I wish you well my friend.

Andro xx

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