Odds and Ends

This does not yet have a title; instead all it has it a rambling that will not be silenced. I am not sure that it is ready for the world but it will not stop chirping away so I must let it be seen. Ready or not. My life is far from a dream, fairy tales are not what they may seem. The prince has a 2x4 instead of a smile, across my head, fleeing tears in my heart. I am not alone, yet I am scared.  Loving a man that is not obtainable,  wishing my way to pain. I do not want the time to be wasted, I would rather be basted.

This week has been a fun one; I began a new party before the last one ended. The parties are fun, and the format of this one is an experiment to see what is working and what is not. To borrow a line from Red over at M3  pull up a rocker and grab a cuppa. We're going to talk.

I am tired of people pretending to be things that they are not. This wordy Wednesday has the potential for a rant, please stay tuned or if you are easily offended change the virtual channel. It is your choice, and I will not be asking anyone to stay if it offends their sensibilities.

I am in the process of writing a new book and the research has been painful at times. Not in a pleasurable way either.

Warning: The following is a rant, and it is not intended for the faint of heart or the whiny. Those that are offended should examine themselves more closely, chances are what I am about to say will hit to close to home for you. One day everything is fine, the next your world falls apart. Why? Let's examine the potential for disaster. Where does it all begin? Truth. Collateral damage happens when innocent bystanders are hurt as a result of actions that were not aimed directly at them. Granting wishes leads those you grant them for to the realization they should have been careful what they wished for.  Wish Granted They say that you should be careful what you wish for because you just might get it. It is not up the wish granter what you wished for; that is up to you. When you get it you might decide that you did not want it at all. It is important not to tell someone something in a moment of anger if you are not prepared to clean up the aftermath of your actions.  Nu...

I've  decided to be Youniquely me, and as a result i'm having my Younique Debut Party! It's virtual, so you can attend anytime anywhere until July 15, 2014. Enjoy! Younique Debt Party!

Happiness seems to be rare these days. I have noticed a lot of people that are not happy, and few that attempt to fake it in an effort to keep the world out of their business. It is out of self defense that people do these things. Some of them are afraid that people will hurt them and others prefer to be alone. Figuring out the difference can be difficult, but not entirely impossible. Getting close enough for them to let you behind the curtain so to speak is all that you have to do. Reality is often why they are the way they are. It can hit when you least expect it, such as during casual conversation. An odd moment occurs when you have two separate conversations because neither of you are paying attention even though you thought you were both intensely focused on the conversation. The speaker might not be attempting to be rude but that is how they come off.  They could have simply stated a fact that you know but felt that there was no need for them to tell you at that moment....

There are times when people do things that hurt others just to make them do what they know is right. It is something that they do out of love, yes love. While difficult to understand at the time there can be a moment of clarity that allows us to see what we couldn't while it was happening. The things that we do for those we love to get them to do what we know is right are many and some of them hurt them. It's a simple concept that few understand until they live it. "I'll be the bad guy, I'll take the black eye." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVGm93II-UA Just listen to the words, it'll sink in soon enough.

It has been a week of confusion that is not going to simplify itself anytime soon. I am not sure when it happened but life is becoming something strange to me. The things that used to be routine are no longer the norm for us. It is what we are learning to adjust to. Through June 2nd I am hosting a virtual party . (The link will open in a new window.) It is a make-up party, the products are ones that I have fallen in love with instantly. It even makes me feel better just to put it on, even when I am having a horrible day. You can see the results for yourself. At the moment I am easing into wearing make-up again so you'll notice just some eye pigment, mascara and lip gloss. While I do not consider myself to be ugly, I am not ready to flaunt on the runway either.  The Younique line is making me feel better, and it doesn't feel heavy like other things I have used. In fact I have fallen so far in love with it that I am planning to become a presenter. I can enjoy the produc...

"Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. Just remember when you're talking to the man upstairs just because he doesn't answer doesn't mean he doesn't care." - Garth Brooks The song is about a man introducing his wife to his high school sweetheart. He is realizing that things worked out for the best. It is a lesson that we all learn at some point. He had imagined that he would spend his life with her, and like many high school romances it didn't work out. Years later he is married to someone else and realizing that the memories he had are not what he thought they were at all. Time had made the picture less of a fairy tale, and more of a young man's dream. The reality he has is better than the fantasy he created all those years ago. Everyone has someone whom they believed that they would cease to exist without. The pain of losing them or never having them feels as if you have breathed your last. I have been told of those that die ...

It is always a good thing to have friends that are family; the ones you can rely on when everything falls apart. They are always there to lend a helping hand, and lift your spirits when it feels as if the world is ending. Then there are those that claim to be there for  you through anything and everything until  you have nothing left to give them. You should be weary of these people. The problem is that it can take months for their true nature to be revealed. You can be under the illusion that you have a friend that will be there through anything until you really need them emotionally. There are those that make everything about them no matter how badly you are hurting; these are the "friends" that you do not need. Those that are so self absorbed and arrogant that they make the assumption that any problem you have emotionally is directly related to them are those that you do not need. It can be frustrating to try and find comfort just to discover that you are only a friend...

They aren't always a bad thing, in fact they can be the best thing at times. Even the worst endings can lead to the best beginnings, and new memories. It is only in the aftermath of shattered pieces, or celebrations that we realize just what the endings mean to us. Paying the Price There is a price for everything that we do, and sometimes it is great. Though there is the occasion when it is small enough that it does not make a dent in our reality. When the price we pay is the ability to move on to something better then everything is worth it. What happens when the price is higher than we wanted to pay? Let's examine both sides. It won't be a drawn out endeavor today, just a brief glance. When things ended on a bad note it can make us resentful of the situation and everything that was involved with it. Regrets come from this type of ending but nothing can be done about them in the end.  When the ending destroys your sanity it is a good bet that it went badly....

Everyone has lied and been lied to. Let it sink in.... It is a fact of life, even when the lies were not intended to hurt you they can. Sparing someone's feelings with a lie means that you have to remember the lie that you told. It could go on for an eternity to ensure they are going to be fine without ever finding out. What happens when they find out? In all reality it depends on the person. There are those forgive even the biggest of lies easily while others use the tiniest of lies to shut people out. It is often seen as the ultimate betrayal. It falls under "you can do anything, just don't lie to me," and it's a concept that some people have difficulty understanding. The mentality is that nothing is as bad as you think it is as long as you are honest about it. There are those that will never understand this concept. They believe that whatever they do is fine as long as they do not get caught. The Flaw  Liars always get caught eventually. It is in th...

The issues that matter the most are often the ones that are most avoided as topics of conversation. I have often wonder why this is, and I began to think about it. I decided to share what I thought with you to see if any of you agree. I have started to think that the reason some topics are avoided is that they are to painful to discuss, or the one attempting to get you to talk about them makes you uncomfortable. We all have that one friend that is always to busy talking to listen; they interrupt at two words and begin giving advice that shows they do not have a clue what is going on in the world around them. There is that friend that gives advice based on something they did a century ago without ever realizing that things might have changed since then. They do not realize that some of the things they tell you would actual cause you to commit fraud if you followed the advice they were giving. Then they tell you things that are actually their confessions to fraud after the fact. Av...

The week was filled with too much socialization for this self proclaimed antisocial being. It had me wondering why I ever moved to civilization in the first place. It was however good for the soul despite the panic that it caused. I am sure that I will be alright, in time. I have three pairs of new shoes thanks to the new friends I have made. One pair of heels, and two pairs of flip flops. It seems my boots were making them hot and my running around barefoot was a cause for concern to them. There were some snakes seen out here, and it seems I am the only one that realizes it is not the bare feet but the panic that they strike at. I had a discussion with my best friend, and some things came to light. They are obvious to us, but not so obvious to the rest of the world. We are very much, actually to much alike to be anything more than friends. The rumors have us dating, but we aren't. We just happen to have shared a lot of the same experiences, and feel the same about a great deal...

I have been told that family is not about blood but loyalty. That is true, I have friendships that have spanned decades as well as new friendships that show adopted family is the one of the best kinds that you can have. They are loyal, loving and come to your aid when you need it the most even when you do not realize that you need their help. It is an amazing feeling to have someone that you can tell anything and everything to without fear of judgement. Knowing that no matter what you say or do they will always be there is a feeling like no other. It's called trust, and whether we admit it or not we all have that one person that we trust more than anyone else in our lives. Having a best friend of the opposite sex is sure to raise a few eyebrows but that is not your problem. There are those that will never comprehend the ability for members of the opposite sex to be friends without having a sexual relationship. They have small minds, and that is there problem. My best friend i...

You will notice that instead of "Wordless Wednesday" I am doing a wordy Wednesday. I have a lot to say. There have been so many changes in recent months that I can't keep up with all of them. Moves, friends and socialization. I missed church Saturday and Sunday. I'll be going tonight, because I made a point to ask the sweet old lady next door to make sure that we were up and functional enough to attend services. She will keep her word and come make sure that we are ready to go. The neighbors are nice enough, and except for a little bit of drama it is relatively quiet out here. I am thankful to be here even if Shorty is the only child living out here. She likes the attention that she is getting as the only child out here. She is so fond of one of my neighbor's mother that she runs out the door to find her at random times. She is hyper at night especially as it nears bedtime and needs prompting to get up at six in order to be ready for school. She makes me ner...

The week ahead promises to be a long one, yet again. I would be actively having a social life of sorts while trying to prevent the baby from injuring herself in a moment of hyperactivity brought on by the rain that is frequent lately. She is adjusting nicely, we made some adjustments at school and she is settling down to very few incidents that are not appropriate in class. Her teacher actually took the time to figure out when the incidents occurred and do something about it. The goal was to make the environment more productive for everyone. It worked, I am more than slightly impressed by the open communication from the school. The teacher is aware that without details no one can help her, so she gives as many as she can and ask questions. After fighting with knots in the kids hair and trying to keep her from jumping on the furniture I am starting the week exhausted. I am hoping that it will be as productive as last week. Actually a bit more, I am making plans for my appointment at...

It has been a rather strange week, trust was lost in an instant and now I'd be trying to see if it was ever really there. It is not something that is given easily after everything, and the thought that the ability to do so was merely an illusion is a devastating one.  Tonight I will pick up the pieces of the week, as the blond child sleeps and prepare for the week ahead. Church tomorrow will be a welcome reprieve for us. The friendly faces and ever present concern for us makes us feel loved. The neighbors are quiet, and keep to themselves, as long as you leave the door closed. Other than that a few will take every opportunity to socialize with you. It is nice most days, until you want to be alone. Then you simply go home and close the door. They take it as a sign to back off. Well, if I put this off any longer it will be a Sunday morning post, so I'll leave you for now.

Secrets all come out in time, and some of them are bad. There are times when having a secret can make you happier than you have ever been in your life. I have one, and it' making me so happy I can't stand myself. When the secret is good part of you wants to announce it to the world while the other part wants to hold it close as long as you can. Well, I hope your day is full of good secrets. I'll be back to ramble later, at the moment my medication is making me sleepy. May your days be filled with sweet surprises.